A Day in the Life of Joe Middle-Class Republican

[The following was reproduced from Michael Moore's website, michaelmoore.com]

August 29th, 2004 9:38 pm
A Day in the Life of Joe Middle-Class Republican

by Donna L. Lavins and Sheldon Cotler

Joe gets up at 6:00 AM to prepare his morning coffee. He fills his pot with good, clean drinking water because some liberal fought for minimum water quality standards. He takes his daily medication with his first swallow of coffee. His medications are safe to take because some liberal fought to insure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10.00 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan. Because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance, now Joe gets it too. He prepares his morning breakfast -- bacon and eggs this day. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

Joe takes his morning shower, reaching for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with every ingredient and the amount that is contains because some liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and the breakdown of its contents. Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some tree-hugging liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work; it saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees. You see, some liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day; he has a good job with excellent pay, medicals benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer meets these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed he'll get worker's compensation or an unemployment check because some liberal didn't think he should loose his home to temporary misfortune.

It's noon time. Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the depression.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae underwritten mortgage and his below market federal student loan because some stupid liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive to dads; his car is among the safest in the world because some liberal fought for car safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. He was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electric until some big government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification (those rural Republican's would still be sitting in the dark).

Joe is happy to see his dad, who is now retired. Joe's dad lives on Social Security and his union pension because some liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to. After his visit with dad, Joe gets back in his car for the ride home. He turns on a radio talk show. The host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't tell Joe that his beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees, "We don't need those big government liberals ruining our lives. After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."

In the years to come, Joe's life will change dramatically. The U.S. dollar will be devalued as a result of our huge deficit, our living standards demolished, our standing with the world diminished and our social security gone...all because some conservative republican made sure he could take care of himself and his buddies.

Aghast, i remain...

Laura Brings Me Back

OK folks, I have these big exams in 28 days, so I've sorta sworn off my blog till then, but good ol' Laura Bush got me back with an interview to Time Magazine. She sees no problem with In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), which destroys tons of embryos, while she and other lunatic evangalists prevent embryonic stem cell research. If someone can help me figure it out, that'd be great!

She also says her big objection with stem cell research is that we may be promoting false hope. Sure, but that doesnt mean there's anything wrong with it! I mean, what about her hubby's money-sucking Mars program, that has been swindling money from education and environmental programs in the promise of ... what again? Or what of that silly missile defense system, which has failed to survive the basic pilot tests mapped for it!

I'm no fan of Kerry's, but looks like we get to decide between Mr. Flip Flop and Mr. Hypocrisy!

Ah, the Joys of Moving ...

OK, so I'm in my office on a Saturday. No, not because I suddenly have discovered hard work, but to get away from hell ... a.k.a. house on moving day. I mean, I would rather scratch myself with a stainless steel utility knife than move. Really, if you would do my moving for me, I can go and buy that knife!

Talking of moving, ever feel like you are just hauling crap from one place to another? So I decided to come up with a 3-year rule ... if I didn't use it for 3 years, out it goes. Great in theory, except what constitutes using. I mean, that card that gal gave me for a birthday when I was a lot younger still gives me goosebumps, so it counts, right. And heaven knows you could never have too many staple pin boxes. So what if some of the pins aren't even for my stapler?!? And so the ritual goes on ... crap becomes valued for a precious few minutes only to turn to crap again ... while you buy new crap to manage the old crap.

Talking of which, how come noone ever thinks of moving when buying furniture. Yeah, that computer desk looks good ... never mind it will take me three freaking days to dismantle so that I can fit it through the door when I move ... oh, and who needs that silly old manual ... we'll turn the screws till it falls apart!!

Ah, how I love moving ...

The BUNZ are toasted!

Really sad to learn that Schlotzky's Deli is filing for bankruptcy. As a former frequent diner, I used to enjoy the food, and while not as good as Quizno's, it is cheaper! The ticker symbol BUNZ now trades for 57 cents a share, and will soon be worth a lot less! Hopefully we don't lose out on the number of stores (it's already been declining!). So folks with money, rally behind the giant and go there for lunch!!

A Democracy Should Work for All

I was once again deeply troubled to read about the displacement of tribals by the Sardar Sarovar Dam in India. While I have read conflicting reports on the economic and environmental implications of the project, none support the dictatorial attitude adopted by the federal and state governments in chasing the tribal inhabitants off, often without adequate compensation or relocation benefits. People in cities cannot seek to justify such horrors in the name of development. It's the tragedy of a democracy that the middle-class and the moneyed, who don't care enough to participate in the electoral process in substantial numbers, dictate so much of our economics, while the poor are misled by false issues to distract them from the real tragedies of governance.

Fat Bob Strikes Back!

OK, so it looks like fat activists are fighting back against notions that being overweight is bad for you. To be fair, some people are genetically heavier, and also may never have issues arising from being overweight. But you know what, some people never have issues from smoking, not all Indians (both Asian and Native American) suffer from diabetes. But as an Asian Indian, if I fail to see that for whatever reason, I'm prone to diabetes and need to take pre-emptive action, well, then I'm a stupid idiot who deserves what I get. Don't get me wrong - I have tons of overweight and fat family ... heck, most of my family could do with a few less pounds. But stop killing the freaking messenger, cut out those starchy foods and get your fat asses to the gym!!